(Note before you read this article that I’m usually the obituary reporter, although I’m not above the occasional pun)
In a shocking turn of events Jason, the retriever of the Golden Fleece has abandoned Medea the princess who was indispensable to him on his quest. The Sorceress is a strong woman but even she has been reduced to tears by this latest turn of events. We got an exclusive interview with the distraught beauty queen she stated that “That (censored) left me for Kim Kardashian, do you know how embarrassing that is I can help him destroy his enemies with a wave of my pinky all she can do is (censored).” We left the depressed princess to continue ranting at mid-air and went on to speak to Jason himself.
After the hero left Medea sitting alone and depressed he was the subject of much controversy in the world of celebrity blogging. Some said that he may never have even loved Medea in the first place and may have even simply used her to get the fleece. We decided to ask the hero himself, here’s how the interview went.
Q: “So did you ever love Medea?”
A: “What you think I could even think about loving her after finding out she was a witch, gods it’s so freaking creepy!”
Q: “Why Kim?”
A:”I’ve always loved her show and she’s just so hot, I couldn’t say no.”
Ouch, poor Medea we can only hope that she never finds out that he didn’t love her. We did however notice an interesting theme in his girlfriends both have had something to do with Media. Until next time!